Sunday, June 9, 2013

Parent Olympics

Today it struck me that parents become very good at some random tasks.  These endeavors are no different than the randomness of some Olympic sports (the luge...seriously?).  Below are some Olympic games for parents that I have different medals in.  Maybe instead of medals you win alone time, an adult dinner party, and a trip to Target sans kids.  Sign me up and I'll begin training....

1.  Getting to the dryer in time to get clothes out without having to iron.

2.  Keeping a child awake while driving home from a seriously exhausting activity. (I would like to set up a camera in cars of parents and record this. I think the different tactics used would make for a very funny documentary or tv special.  I digress.)

3.  Opening a very heavy door while pushing a stroller (I get a "Thanks For Participating" certificate for this one.)

4.  Changing a diarrhea laden diaper.  The amount of wipes used is taken into consideration.

5.  Having a conversation or reasoning with a two year old.  (I don't even qualify for this one.)

6.  Holding a crying child and finding out that a weird hip swing, bounce, sway while pacing is the only maneuver to get peace and quiet.

7.  Counting to ten (and making it to ten without blowing up) while watching toddler have a meltdown in a public place.  (What would be YOUR medal qualification on this one?)

8.  Putting clean sheets and comforter back on a stripped king size bed....while child is playing in the middle of the bed.  (I will give myself a silver in this.  I can do it.  Just not quickly.)

9.  Taking child to public restroom and making sure they don't touch anything including trash can, toilets, bathroom walls, stalls, sinks, while you use the restroom.

10.  Keeping a child reasonably quiet and entertained while on a three hour flight.  (I'm training for this tomorrow and will let you know if I qualify)

What are some Parent Olympic sports that you could qualify for or medal in?

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